The Vagus Nerve, Trauma, and Why Your Body Feels Stuck on “High Alert”

If you’ve ever felt completely exhausted but still forced yourself to keep going, you’re not alone. Many women living with trauma — especially long-term or systemic stress — don’t realize how dysregulated their nervous system has become until their body starts sending louder signals.

I know this firsthand. Through my own experiences with trauma, I learned that it’s often only after we’re running on empty that we notice something is wrong. You may feel irritable, on edge, or constantly scanning your environment. You might even notice feelings of paranoia or a deep sense of hypervigilance — like you can never fully relax. If this sounds familiar, there is good news: this isn’t a personal failure, and you don’t have to live this way.

Let me share something I wish I had understood much sooner.

When we experience trauma — or triggers, if that term feels more accessible — the brain shifts into survival mode. This process begins in the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for detecting threats. Think of it as your brain’s internal alarm system. When the amygdala senses danger (real or perceived), it alerts the hypothalamus, which coordinates the autonomic nervous system and activates the stress response.

In simple terms, your brain shouts, “Something isn’t safe!” and your body responds accordingly.

This is where the nervous system — including the vagus nerve — comes into play. Stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol are released, preparing your body to protect you. You may notice:

·       Your heart rate increases

·       Your breathing becomes faster or shallower

·       Blood sugar rises to provide quick energy

·       Blood flow shifts away from digestion and other non-essential functions

·       Your senses become sharper

This state of heightened awareness is known as hypervigilance. It’s incredibly useful in moments of real danger — like avoiding a car accident or escaping a physical threat. Your body is doing exactly what it was designed to do to keep you safe and/or alive.

But what happens when the threat isn’t immediate?

What if you’re not in danger — you’re just managing work deadlines, family responsibilities, relationships, finances, and the invisible mental load so many women carry every day? When stress becomes chronic, the nervous system doesn’t get the signal that it’s safe to return to rest.

Over time, this constant activation can overwhelm the vagus nerve — the nerve responsible for helping the body shift out of stress and into regulation, rest, and connection. When the vagus nerve isn’t functioning optimally, it becomes much harder for your body to calm itself down.

Chronic stressors — toxic work or home environments, financial strain, or reminders of past experiences — can keep your system stuck in survival mode. You may experience difficulty sleeping, frequent headaches, digestive issues, anxiety, or depression. These are not signs of weakness; they are signs of a nervous system that has been working overtime for far too long.

Many women experience this more intensely simply because our plates are often overflowing. We’re expected to be caregivers, professionals, partners, and emotional anchors — often without enough support or rest.

You may have heard the phrase “they just flipped their lid.” This is actually a helpful way to understand what happens neurologically. When stress responses are activated, the amygdala essentially “flips open,” preparing us for one of four responses: fight, flight, freeze, or appease.

Ideally, once a threat passes, the vagus nerve helps signal safety and allows the body to return to balance. But with ongoing stress or unresolved trauma, that “lid” can stay flipped open. You may feel like you’re always waiting for something to go wrong, even when things seem calm.

If you’re reading this and quietly thinking, “This feels like me,” that awareness matters. It may be a sign that your nervous system needs support — not more pushing through.

There are many therapeutic approaches that can help calm the nervous system, support vagus nerve regulation, and gently “close the lid” on the stress response. This can include working with a therapist, practicing mindfulness and grounding techniques, developing sustainable routines, and processing past experiences so they no longer hold the same weight.

Talking about trauma isn’t just emotional — it’s physiological. Research consistently shows that trauma-informed care helps individuals feel safer, more empowered, and better able to regulate their stress responses. One resource I often recommend is an article from the National Library of Medicine that explains trauma-informed care and its impact.

As the article beautifully states:

“Trauma-informed therapy emphasizes shifting the focus from ‘What’s wrong with you?’ to ‘What happened to you?’ This approach provides a framework for understanding and responding to the effects of trauma, prioritizing the creation of a safe, supportive, and empowering environment for individuals who have experienced trauma.”

Whatever path you choose, I hope you consider reaching out for support. Healing doesn’t mean erasing the past — it means learning how to feel safe in your body again. With the right guidance, it’s possible to develop skills that help regulate your nervous system, strengthen your vagus nerve, and respond to stress with more compassion and control.

You deserve a life that feels full and connected — not one spent simply getting through the next moment. If you’re ready to explore what support could look like for you, I would be honored to walk alongside you.